As a representative of one of the largest video game makers in the world, I am on the telephone with the good people of the United States to help them get their problems resolved. I would like to say that most of the time these calls are clear and straightforward, but sadly they are not. We have all the tools to help you, but I have found that it is usually the consumer that ends up making things difficult.
This article is intended to help you poor souls who need support with their game console. If you follow these rules, then everything will be fine, and if you don’t then things will probably be difficult for you.
Please speak clearly and be respectful. Do not talk to us like we are your “homies” or “baby mama” or any of the other slimeballs that choose to spend time with you.
Don’t be vague. We aren’t mind readers. Starting off with “Yeah, uh, I put my thing in the doohickey and now my game doesn’t do nuffing” is not a good way to get your problem resolved.
If you’re going to be nasty to a rep, remember that they are probably temporary help, get paid very little, have access to your personal information, and could be, in fact, a completely insane stalker with a chip on their shoulder.
Don’t curse at us or use abusive language. We are people, just like you, and we are trying to help you. We have the right to hang up on you if you’re being a dick.
We can only help with products we make. We don’t support guitar controllers made by Activision or wireless fitness accessories from another company. Use some common sense.
We answer the phones with an application on our computer. The “hang up” button and “hold” button are right next to each other and look amazingly similar.