Mario is back in yet another game. Yes, the pudgy plumber can’t seem to get enough of stomping on those goombas, and rescuing princesses from turtle-dinosaurs could be his only hobby (besides eating of course…). Mario seems to enjoy these monotonous adventures, and for some god-forsaken reason, so do we. Welcome to the *New* Super Mario Bros.!
This time, Mario is happily strolling with the Princess Peach, when she notices that her beloved castle is on fire! While Mario runs off to investigate, Princess Peach is kidnapped by an unknown monster! Witnesses claim the monster is Bowser Jr., who seems to think that Princess Peach is his mother. (Peach is evidently a promiscuous Princess….she must have had strong “mushroom goggles” to mistake Bowser for mustachioed Mario….) The story is…. you guessed it! Rescue Peach from Bowser Jr. and once again save the Mushroom Kingdom.