Nerd Fitness 2: Workout for your workspace

Alrighty my tubby friends.  I’m back with part two to my Nerd Fitness article.  You already know that it is possible to eat better when you are sitting on your dead ass in front of your monitor downloading really bad 80’s songs to your iTunes.  Now I’ll give you a few ways to get some exercise without ever leaving your workspace, and give you a few snack choices that might actually make your more productive and eager to work.  Assuming that you are not too far gone.  If so, go see a doctor and pray that you can still fit into your Geo Metro.

As the bossman Alan so graciously commented on the first article, he puts his recumbant bike under his desk and exercises his legs as he works.  Let’s humor him and say that he actually does do this, that’s a great way to get blood pumping through what would normally be worthless limbs that are just hanging from your office chair.  Most compact and stow-away treadmills can be equipped with a cradle to hold a laptop into place.  In the time it takes you to check your email and download bootleg Britney Spears songs you could have walked a mile and burned enough calories to make up for the stale candy bar you found under your couch and ate anyway.

Get on eBay and Craigslist and you will most likely find very cheap equipment that could get you into the best shape of your life.  I personally found Billy’s Bootcamp, which I use 3 times per week.  I play it right on my computer and it only takes one hour per day.  It’s great for cardio and for muscle toning.  The best part is that I got it for just over $20 on eBay.  Sure you could say that Tae Bo is gay.  But one of us is going to be a fat bastard by the time I’m done with it, and it sure isn’t going to be me.  Good grief, anything is better than sitting and doing nothing.

Just about any cardio program can be done right in front of your computer.  If you’re really desperate you can get a copy of some Richard Simmons dance video and “jam to the oldies” if you want.  Free weights are a great way to tone your chest and arms while at the keyboard.  Get a small variety of dumbells, and I don’t mean your relatives, and keep them near the computer so you will see them and remember they are there.  If you don’t use them, you just blew some money and are lazy.  What, you want me to sugar coat it?


I found that I can do crunches until I can’t see straight if I am watching an action or suspenseful movie while doing them.  It’s not easy to keep your eyes on the screen, but if you just move around a little you’ll figure it out.  Keeping your mind focused on your stomach while watching a movie can be a little difficult at first, but keep at it and eventually you’ll notice your stomach burning and not even realize you were doing crunches for half an hour.

Using a program like Calorie King will assist you in keeping track of your eating and exercise habits.  It has a huge database of foods and their nutrition facts, and can tell you how many calories you have used up during the course of a day.  Take all the help you can.  Weight loss is a never-ending road, and on a trip like that you’ll want every ride you can hitch.

Trail mix is a great way to stay on top of things if you’re feeling tired and weak.  The protein packed in dried nuts and fruit packs a punch that can last for hours.  Beef and Turkey Jerky is also a high-protein snack that is powerful.  Just avoid eating too much as the sodium intake is not worth the taste.  Get a blender and mix yourself up some smoothies, or grill some chicken with lemon pepper for dinner and get an extra energy boost that is lean in fat and high in protein.

And last but not least, yet the most expensive, is the all new Wii Fit.  Hey, it’s blog for a game and hardware site right?  I had to throw it in there.  The Wii Fit is a work of art in a world where games have captured the imagination but belittled the body.  Nintendo really outdid themselves with this one, and I don’t see any reason why you shouldn’t add this to your workspace gym.

Okay, that’s enough for one day.  Next time I’ll cover meditation and yoga.  No, no I won’t.  I’m just kidding.  I think we all know that right along with Tae Bo enthusiasts, meditators and yoganators are gay….. right tubby?

Don is an avid gamer, writer, screen writer,part time game maker, film director, and horror film fanatic. You can check out his book "How to Survive Zombies and Other Disasters" on Amazon.