Betty White, Midgets, and Super Mario

I had a long reply all ready, but I found this really interesting thing on TV about The Universe. When the commercial came on there was Betty White talking about PetMets or something. Did you know that she left 4 million dollars to her pets? Old people are crazy if you ask me. Which reminds me, why is it that some cable channels that are focused on children (like Nikelodeon) running commercials for Term Life Insurance? Seriously, in one commercial break I saw a commercial for Baby Bottle Pops, Life Insurance, Kidz Bop CDs, and diapers! These guys seriously need to reel in their demographic, because right now it looks like they’re targeting 12-year-olds that are having babies, but need a financial planner.

Midgets. Did you know that in Florida and California there are these Midget villiages where everything is scaled down to their height, and you have to be a midget to get in? Man, I would love to one day get all liquored up and stroll through the town like Godzilla. “Oh my god! He’s a giant! Those are 30 length pants!”

Did you know there’s a new Godzilla game coming for the Wii.  It looks alot like “King of the Monsters” for the SNES.  I remember getting the SNES and was so disappointed in that game.  I mean, it was like $40 and was the only other game besides Super Mario World that I had, and I suck at Super Mario World.  One thing that was cool living alone with my SNES was the super-cool Toprical Breeze Glade Plugin that I had.  It made the entire duplex smell like candied oranges.  They kinda start to change their flavour when they get dried out, which seems to be like after 2 weeks.  The package says it lasts for one month. Those crooks!  I switched to scented oils, but Queer Eye says that you shouldn’t use home fragrances because it looks like you’re trying to cover something.

But, ya, I toally agree. The mind is a terrible thing… and must be stopped, before it kills someone!

Alan is a web architect, stand-up comedian, and your friendly neighborhood Grammar Nazi. You can stalk him on the Interwebs via Google+, Facebook and follow his ass on Twitter @ocmodshop.